CNATI: Cincinnati OH Sports Journalism

GLENDALE, Ariz. -- A couple of other things from Aroldis Chapman's outing on Friday.

Here's the pitch-by-pitch if you're interested:

Repko -- B, F3
DeJesus -- B, B, B, K(L), K(L), 1B
Furcal -- K, F, B, B, 1B
Ausmus -- F, K (Reyes, pr, CS), B, B, B, 3

Either -- K(L), 5f
Kemp -- K(Looking, 100 mph), K, B, F, B, B, F, K (90 mph change)
Blake -- K (L), B, K, B, B, K (looking, 83 mph change)

* Ramon Hernandez may have saved the life of a photographer. In spring, Photographers often get behind the catchers to get a good shot of the pitchers warming up. Hernandez moved a photographer before Chapman started warming up. "When someone's throwing that hard, you don't want to be there." And it was a good thing, Chapman's first warm-up pitch sailed wide, Hernandez missed it and it was right where the photographer had been.

* Some interesting stuff from Dusty before the game about Chapman's development and challenges ahead off the field.

On Fossas: "Sooner or later we're going to have to ween him off of Fossas," Baker said. "We have a lot of people, a lot of Latin guys, who can help him, keep things in perspective."

Dusty said Chapman doesn't necessarily need a Spanish-speaking catcher all the time.

"If he's throwing well, they don't need to talk. Cabrera's there too in the infield, Cairo too. Who did Nomo talk to when he came over? He did pretty good. It's baseball, you don't have to speak. You can put your hand up, your shoulder in the air, there are certain things in baseball and sports in general, you don't need to know the language, the game's the same. I'd imagine, Nomo, Ichiro, Matsui. Imagine how hard it was on Masanori Murakami, he had nobody. These are things we're going to have to deal with with international baseball."

* On Fernando comparisons: "I remember everyone asking me if Fernando was really 19, yeah, he was. Everyone assumes the Latin guys are older than they are just because a few guys haven't been. This guy's young. Look at him. Talk to him. If this guy hadn't gotten this money, you wouldn't even be here talking about him. There's another Cuban guy (Kansas City pitcher Noel Arguelles) out here with another team and I haven't heard anything about him."

* Postgame: "Chapman threw the ball, he had a real good changeup today. We've got to keep them off his fastball. He was throwing it different times in the count. Ramon worked him well."

"Some of his (fastballs) were sailing out of the zone. All in all it was a good day. You've got to keep him in the zone. He got some pretty good hitters out too. You know it's early , but he's getting his feet wet and threw well. He got out some good hitters, they may not be in tip-top form, but neither is he."

GLENDALE, Ariz. -- Maybe it's a new leaf for Bronson Arroyo, or more likely it's just spring training.

Arroyo sang six songs Thursday night at Jake Peavy's Woodjock event in Scottsdale, and was good for three shutout innings Friday afternoon at the Dodgers' Camelback Ranch. Arroyo pitched three innings, gave up two hits and struck out one.

Arroyo said he had no temptation to play guitar Thursday night.

"I don't want to do it, because it really is a problem. And the last thing I need is a video of me playing guitar. If they saw that, I'd be called back up to Mr. Castellini's house for a talk."

Castellini has a place in Scottsdale in a development called The Sanctuary. And What's there stays there, apparently.

"That house (in Scottsdale) is on the edge of a cliff for a reason," Arroyo said

He played in the middle of the set on Thursday, but he's opening today. After his three innings and one by Francisco Cordero, Aroldis Chapman is scheduled to throw two innings "or maybe three," Dusty Baker said.

* Barry Larkin and Sean Casey were in camp this morning.

"It's all part of the rebuilding process. I watch USC football games and I see Marcus Allen on the sidelines, Ronnie Lott, the great running backs," Baker said. "You see UCLA basketball games, all the old dudes. On the Raiders sideline, you see Jack Tatum, Ted Hendricks. You need to know what it means to be a Red."

Currently in camp are Larkin, Casey and Eric Davis, not to mentions former Reds now serving as coaches such as Mario Soto and Billy Hatcher. Add to that some of the other big leaguers Baker's brought around, like Tony Phillips, Ellis Burks and Chili Davis. Joe Morgan has also been in camp. Put them all together a pretty decent team.

Baker said he also liked having former players in camp when he was with the Dodgers and when he was a coach and manager with the Giants.

"If they can do or say one thing to help get a kid's career jumpstarted or figured out," Baker said. "We're like their parents, sometimes it's better to hear it from someone else."

Today our TOL guest series continues with Amy from Red Letter Daze. When she's not watching baseball, Amy's a mother of three and freelance copy editor who fights the good fight against Alpha Moms and misplaced apostrophes. Actually, she's all that when she is watching baseball, too.

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Thanks to Trent for inviting me to fill in for a day!

I'm headed to Goodyear in the near future--very excited about it--anyone else already been? Any good stories from your trip? Drop me a comment and share.

 * Nothing says Reds baseball like an ice-cold Hudepohl...and on March 29 Hudy Delight, Hudy 14-K and the Cincinnati Baseball Hall of Fame will release commemorative cans honoring 2010 inductees Chris Sabo, Pedro Borbon and Tony Mullane. Twelve-packs of the specially marked cans will be available just in time for Opening Day festivities.

* Celebrate the opening of the Hall of Fame's new exhibit honoring the 1990 World Champion Reds team and the Maker's Mark 2010 Lane's End Stakes Bottle, also honoring the 1990 Reds. An $80 ticket gets you a preview of the exhibit and a buffet dinner at GABP's Champions Club. Reds HOF members and Maker's Mark Ambassadors get a discount. Maker's Mark Ambassador? How does one apply for that gig?

* RIP Merlin Olsen, NFL Hall of Famer and "Fearsome Foursome" member who was better known to me as the Ingalls family's kindly neighbor on TV.

* Fans of CBS's super-nerdy-fun "Big Bang Theory" will recognize this t-shirt from ThinkGeek.com: Koothrappali's personal soundtrack shirt. Not surprisingly, it appears Raj went beyond the shirt's 20 built-in sound clips and added his own mp3s via SD card. It'll even play your iPod! Seriously cool.

* Speaking of geeky, this website rocks. I freely admit I don't understand all the comics (math is hard), but the Dirty Harry/Rain Man one is hilarious, and I can't NOT link to the "your mom" comic (good times, good times).

* Anyone else still oddly intrigued by the fantasy life of a sock monkey? How badass is that tattoo?

* Required TOL music link--yeah, you knew who it was gonna be. I love that his rave reviews describe him as "pissy." Just listen to the lyrics from "Ruby and Carlos", and then watch him tear it up in  "Freeway View" from the Live in Europe CD. The man is a rare talent.

And if McMurtry isn't your style, this duo was a blast to watch opening for Wilco last fall. Liam Finn's a wild man on stage--he's also Neil Finn's son, for those of us old enough to remember Crowded House.

I'm also liking folk trio Red Molly these days, and not just because their name came from an awesome song.

* And finally, to counteract Mr. R's ugly animal from earlier in the week, here's the Columbus Zoo's new baby bonobo, born this month. Pretty sure "bonobo" translates to "really stinkin' cute."

PHOENIX, Ariz. -- Before I head to the ballpark, here's the Reds lineup and travel roster for the day:

Drew Stubbs ................ CF
Orlando Cabrera .......... SS
Joey Votto ....................DH
Brandon Phillips............2B
Scott Rolen ...................3B
Jay Bruce..................... RF
Jonny Gomes ...............LF
Ramon Hernandez ........ C
Todd Frazier..................1B
Bronson Arroyo ......... RHP

Pitchers
Arroyo, Bronson ............... RHP
Chapman, Aroldis ............. LHP
Cordero, Francisco .......... RHP
Fisher, Carlos................... RHP
Geronimo, Ramon.............RHP
Owings, Micah ................. RHP
Smith, Jordan ................... RHP

Catchers
Castillo, Wilkin...........C/INF/OF
Hanigan, Ryan ...................... C
Hernandez, Ramon ............... C
Mesoraco, Devin ................... C

Infielders
Alonso, Yonder .................. INF
Cabrera, Orlando ............... INF
Frazier, Todd................ INF/OF
Janish, Paul ....................... INF
Miles, Aaron ....................... INF
Phillips, Brandon ................ INF
Rolen, Scott ....................... INF
Valaika, Chris ..................... INF
Votto, Joey ......................... INF

Outfielders
Balentien, Wladimir ............. OF
Bruce, Jay ........................... OF
Dickerson, Chris.................. OF
Gomes, Jonny ..................... OF
Heisey, Chris....................... OF
Nix, Laynce ......................... OF
Stubbs, Drew ...................... OF

GOODYEAR, Ariz. -- I couldn't leave you guys altogether...

Really, I can't thank everyone for helping me out enough. It's been fun to read other things that people come up with and find. Of course, my Google Reader is now officially out of control.

* So last night I went to the place that is supposed to have the best pizza in America. I was all set to say it was overrated -- because by definition, it pretty much has to be, right? Well, thing is, even after a nearly 2-hour wait, I couldn't remember a better pizza. It was fantastic. The wait was ridiculous, but I'd forgotten all about it as I was walking back to my car. I think that says quite a bit.

Phoenix has quite the pizza. Pizzeria Bianco, as noted, was fantastic. So is Cibo, also in downtown Phoenix. I've also been to La Piazza Al Forno in Glendale, also great. Come to Arizona for the baseball, but make sure you take in the pizza.

* An interesting ranking of farm systems has the Reds pretty high. Baeball Prospectus had them at 9.

* Is Drew Sutton this year's Ben Zobrist?

* An update on this year's likely top pick by the Washington Nationals, Bryce Harper.

* I've got to give New Era credit for just coming out and saying it -- the new, ugly batting practice hats are just about moving more merchandise. Odd when honesty is refreshing, isn't it?

* Physics and test say a headfirst slide is faster than a feetfirst one.

* How minor league teams are using social media.

* Catching up with Chico Harlan of the Washington Post, who is leaving the baseball beat. Last year Harlan talked about his dislike of covering sports and was roasted. It wasn't the most artful declaration from Chico, but I understand where he was coming from. Chico's headed to Tokyo to write for the Post's bureau there.

* As if gettng work done on a computer wasn't already tough enough, NFL Films is going to Hulu. There are days I think I prefer NFL Films to the NFL. Most of them, really.

* Ivan Maisel on Alabama's trip to the White House.

* A phenomenal story on Kansas State's Denis Clemente, who is the cousin of Roberto.

* The greatest dunker ever says LeBron James should participate in the slam dunk contest. (I know that's going to get some comments, but man, 'Nique was awesome. And he was robbed in that contest in Chicago.

* I'm never sure if hockey players are tough or crazy. There's a fine line.

* I know this is odd to most, but I love college tennis (go to the NCAA tennis tournament in Athens, Ga., and you'll love it to -- if you like tennis). ESPN has a piece on John Isner, a former college player who is now one of the top-ranked Americans on tour. His college experience is rare on tour.

* Details from EA on NCAA 10.

* I'm still not entirely sure where I fall on the iPad (other than I want one) but I did hear a lot of people say it's going to fail and that sounded pretty familiar to me.

* Why nobody thought of this before, I'll never know.

* I didn't know until my friend told me at dinner on Tuesday that Mark Linkous died. Go get some Sparklehorse, Linkous was amazing.

* Background on the Ronnie and Neil "feud"

* I'm not sure pizza is what I think of when I think about Ryan Adams.

* There's no wrong time for tacos.

* If you're not watching Parks and Recreaction on Thursday nights, you're missing out. It's been the best NBC show on Thursday. I know the first season was terrible, but the second season has been gold. It may be the funniest show on TV right now. Yep, even better than Modern Family. Anyway, the theme will never be the same for me after seeing this.

* I wish I had HBO just for The Pacific. I loved Band of Brothers, will be interested to see The Pacific (when it comes out on DVD)

* No Coco in Cincy

* The Mad Men Barbie dolls just look weird.

GOODYEAR, Ariz. -- The Reds reassigned five players to minor league camp on Wednesday: catcher Chris Denove and Brandon Yarbrough, outfielder/first baseman Danny Dorn, pitchers Alexander Smit and Jose Arredondo.

Dusty Baker said he was impressed by Dorn.

"It was a matter of how much playing time he was going to get, I think he recognized pitches as quick as any of the young players we had here," Baker said. "He big-time got better at first base over there too, he told me he'd never played over that."

* Aaron Miles will be back in the lineup tomorrow, and Chris Burke is getting closer. Burke hit off the tee yesterday and will hit soft toss today.

* Todd Frazier was hit again yesterday, though this time he said he got hit in the butt. In the team's intrasquad game, Aroldis Chapman hit him in the knee.

"(Billings manager) Julio Garcia told me to wash my uniform because it's apparently got a bull's-eye on the back," Frazier said.

Frazier said he thought it was "funny" he kept getting hit. Me, I told him he'd probably find it funnier if someone else was the one getting hit.

* Todays' Reds lineup:
Dickerson 8
Cabrera 6
Votto 3
Rolen 5
Gomes 7
Balentien 9
Valaika 4
Hanigan 2
Nix DH

PItchers
Cueto (3 innings)
Masset (1)
Herrera (1)
Burton (1)
Del Rosario (1)
Viola (1)
Ondrusek (1)

Brewers
Jody Gerut LF
Joe Inglett 2B
Corey Hart RF
Jim Edmonds CF
Casey McGehee 3B
Steffan Wilson 1B
Matt Treanor C
Luis Cruz SS
Chris Narveson P

No DH for the Brewers today, an interesting choice... I can't imagine what would happen on the ol' internets if Dusty did that

* Barry Larkin is scheduled to get here today to serve as a guest instructor for the next 10 days. You'll have Larkin, Davis and Hatcher off the '90 Reds.

* Tomorrow's pitchers: Bronson Arroyo, Micah Owings, Aroldis Chapman, Carlos Fisher and Francisco Cordero.

Chapman is scheduled to throw on March 17, too, when the Reds have a day-night doubleheader.

PHOENIX -- Here's the travel roster and lineup for today's tilt in Tempe against the Angels.

Drew Stubbs ................ CF
Chris Heisey .................LF
Brandon Phillips............2B
Juan Francisco .............3B
Ramon Hernandez ........ C
Jay Bruce..................... RF
Yonder Alonso...............1B
Todd Frazier.................DH
Paul Janish .................. SS
Mike Lincoln.............. RHP

Pitchers
Del Rosario, Enerio .......... RHP
Leake, Mike...................... RHP
Lincoln, Mike .................... RHP
Ondrusek, Logan ............. RHP
Rhodes, Arthur .................. LHP
Valiquette, Philippe ........... LHP
Wells, Kip ......................... RHP
Wood, Travis ..................... LHP

Catchers
Castillo, Wilkin....................... C
Hernandez, Ramon ............... C
Mesoraco, Devin ................... C
Miller, Corky .......................... C

Infielders
Alonso, Yonder .................. INF
Cairo, Miguel ...................... INF
Francisco, Juan.................. INF
Frazier, Todd................ INF/OF
Janish, Paul ....................... INF
Phillips, Brandon ................ INF
Sutton, Drew ...................... INF
Valaika, Chris ..................... INF

Outfielders
Anderson, Josh ................... OF
Balentien, Wladimir ............. OF
Bruce, Jay ........................... OF
Heisey, Chris....................... OF
Nix, Laynce ......................... OF
Stubbs, Drew ...................... OF

So the gang here at CNati decided to pitch in and help C. Trent out while he's slaving away in [snow-free] Arizona.  This week we'll try our hand at TOL, but be warned:  C. Trent might like sneakers, Apple products, Japanese baseball and bacon, but the rest of us have our quirks too.

Today your guest blogger is Lee Heidel from the CNati blog C-Notes.  Lee is the co-founder of CNati.com and the guy who gets called when something goes wrong.

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SAVANNAH, GA --Thanks to CTR for having me back today. Watching his videos from spring training, I have to say I'm pretty jealous. Trent will be the first to tell you that it's not as much fun when you have to work; but it's still a pretty sweet gig.

* Before I get started, the Onion has some breaking news. You may want to throw some headphones on if you're at work. My wife is a former TV news reporter and that is pretty much the formula to every local news story.

* A fairly complete archive of Spin magazine is now online thanks to Google Books. Remember when magazines wanted you to order backissues? Now, you can read their glowing review of the Afghan Whigs album Black Love in its original format for free.

* In my best Mo Egger impersonation, here's a lovely lady to start your day.

* Jim Halpert (John Kransinki) may actually play Captain America in the upcoming film reboot of everyone's favorite super soldier. Yes, reboot. Do you not remember the last Captain America movie? Here's a refresher. I hope it picks up where the original left off.

* C-3PO smoking a cigarette. And a Star Wars themed version of the childrens book Goodnight Moon.

* Queen City Discovery is my favorite Cincy blog not located at CNati.com. This week, they showed us an in-depth look of the abandoned Cincinnati subway.

* Chuck Klosterman, one of the few that can eloquently shift between sports and music journalism, guests on Bill Simmons' BS Report podcast. They talk about Tiger Woods and John Mayer, proving my aforementioned point.

* Lost Boys star Corey Haim (not that one, the other one) died after an apparent drug overdose this morning.

* Do a lot of traveling? Can't get your super-sized container of mousse through security in your carry-on? Suite Arrival ships toiletries to your hotel in advance.

* Mark Bennett makes architectural drawings of sitcom houses.

* Cake Wrecks investigates sports-themed cakes gone horribly wrong.

* And finally, Nirvana on ice.

 

GOODYEAR, Ariz. -- Yesterday it was warmer in Cincinnati than here and it may be the same today. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Diamondbacks
Stephen Drew 6
Conor Jackson 7
Justin Upton 9
Mark Reynolds 5
Kelly Johnson 4
Chris Young DH
Chris Snyder 2
Brandon Allen 3
Cole Gillespie 8

Pitchers (all RHP)
Billy Buckner
Roque Mercedes
Jose Marte
Blaine Boyer
Juan Gutierrez

Redlegs
Drew Stubbs CF
Orlando Cabrera SS
Joey Votto 1B
Brandon Phillips 2B
Scott Rolen 3B
Jay Bruce DH
Jonny Gomes LF
Wladimir Balentien RF
Ryan Hanigan C

Pitchers
Aaron Harang (3 innings)
Francisco Cordero (1)
Matt Maloney (2)
Sam LeCure (1)
Alexander Smit (1)
Jon Adkins (1)

* Mike Lincoln has two more scheduled starts, and Matt Maloney will get one as well.

Here's the upcoming rotation:
Tue vs Ari: RHP Aaron Harang (6-14, 4.21) vs RHP Billy Buckner (4-6, 6.40) 3:05et
Wed at LAA: RHP Mike Lincoln (0-1, 27.00) vs LHP Trevor Reckling (0-0, 4.50) 3:05et
Thu vs Mil (ss): RHP Johnny Cueto (0-1, 9.00) vs LHP Chris Narveson (0-0, 0.00) 3:05et
Fri at LAD (ss): RHP Bronson Arroyo (0-0, 0.00) vs LHP Clayton Kershaw (0-0, 4.50) 3:05et
Sat at Cubs (ss): RHP Homer Bailey (8-5, 4.53) vs TBA 700 wlw, 3:05et
Sun vs WSox: LHP Matt Maloney (2-4, 4.87) vs TBA 700 wlw, 3:05et
Mon vs Oak: RHP Mike Lincoln vs TBA 3:05e

* Dusty Baker said the team is looking for another "B" game, they'd like one Sunday the 14th.

The B game yesterday gave them a chance to look at more players.

"It may not count in the stats, but it counts to us," Baker said.

Our Thinking out Loud spring training guest series continues with Mr. R from the Reds forum Red Letter Daze. You have undoubtedly seen him on the Reds blogosphere as the curmudgeon "Mr. Redlegs" or "MisterRedlegs," but at his gilded age he likes to save typing characters whenever possible. That's why he loves Twitter, you dope-smokers.

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Happy birthday to Ms. R, who turned [bleep!] on Saturday and conducts what she calls the "Monthlong Celebration Tour." No joke, she gets free lunches and dinners from friends and family as she can schedule them throughout March. It's quite the racket. I'm never invited.

* Reds fireballer Aroldis Chapman hit 100 and (a questionable) 102 mph on scouts guns Monday during his two-inning stint against the Royals. That performance lit up Al's Internets like a Saturn V and starts raising the legit question about Chapman jumping straight to the big leagues. "I'll take 100 with command," says manager Dusty Baker, unabashingly.

Chapman also excited the ultra-excitable omgReds.com, where Dan was quick to illustrate this Chapman card.

Phil Rogers of the Chicago Tribune tweeted, "Just saw the future of pitching. His name is Aroldis Chapman. . . Seriously, he looks like a great $30 million investment for the Reds."

Gushed former scout Frankie Piliere of AOL Fanhouse: "This early and apparently with some consistency. . . that's incredible."

Joe Posnanski of Sports Illustrated was on the scene and filed a beauty of a story, quoting a scout that Chapman is the best left-handed arm he's seen since Herb Score. For you kiddies, that's going back to 1955.

Dave Shenin of the Washington Post also witnessed and was a little more critical. Perhaps the best observation of the day came from funnyman Jamie Ramsey of the Reds' media relations department:

"As a batter, imagine facing a DRay Herrera 68 mph screwball two innings after you had to catch up with an Aroldis 102 mph heater."

*Despite the Chapman excitement and good storylines from Reds camp, anyone else not feeling the usual spring training buzz across the Reds fan base yet? Neither are the ticket takers at Goodyear. In three games, the Reds have drawn a miserable 12,145 fans for just 40.5 percent of stadium capacity. . .

* Because this column is titled, "Thinking Out Loud," let's think about how much of Chapman's $30.25 mil spread over 10 years the Redlegs can recoup this season if he's on the big-league roster out of spring training.

* It's a big day for Washington Nationals fans as their own pitching phenom, 2009 No. 1 pick Stephen Strasburg, greatest . . . prospect . . . ever (or since Ben McDonald in 1989), makes his debut against the Tiggers at 1 p.m. The game will be televised in the mid-Atlantic on MASN and nationally on MLB.TV. Phil Rogers made this observation yesterday: "Strasburg. . . better than Chapman? I'll believe it when I see it."

* Oft-injured former Reds OF Josh Hamilton on the market? Nick Cafardo of the Boston Globe quotes a scout as saying, "Everybody in Texas denies it, and I don't know what to base it on, but there's a feeling the Rangers may do something, and teams want to be ready."

* I have no vested interest in U. of Cinti basketball but for a couple of weeks now I've watched with demented curiosity the spewing of venom from the Bearcats faithful. I've seen two full UC games on TV and small parts of two others this season. Do Bearcats fans hate Mick Cronin because he's not Bob Huggins, or because Miss Beasley in gym class out-coaches him?

* One of the most common complaints about Cronin is he makes excuses. I don't know if that's true, but I do know that in 34 years of sports journalism I've never heard a coach on any level blaming game officials for three losses. Even Miss Beasley in gym class ain't that stupid.

* Then, Monday evening, Paul Dehner Jr. posted an amazing story here on Cnati.com where Cronin says former 5-star recruit Yancy Gates is a victim of lofty expectations. "So, the problem with Yancy is people want him to be something he's not," Cronin says.

Say what?!?! 

Dehner craftily refers to a 2008 article by Bearcats announcer Dan Hoard quoting the coach saying Gates is "the most talented big guy that I have ever recruited. For a coach it's exciting because he's got everything that you can't teach. Everything that Yancy needs are things that can be taught."

Wow. Just . . . wow. Where I come from, which is pretty much the same as where anyone else comes from, that's called talking out both sides of your yakker. Or making excuses. You choose.

* If the NCAA expands the basketball tournament to 4,256 teams, not only does the regular season not have meaning, but neither does the cash cow conference tournaments. The Big East Tourney opens today at Madison Square Garden and there is a lot at stake for 5-6 teams.

* Antonio Bryant and Terrell Owens? Ever wish you were a fly on the wall of Bengals owner Mike Brown so you'd know just what the hell he is thinking at times?

* 85 on "Dancing With the Stars." You scoff. You won't watch. You seen those professional dancers? Best optical workout since "Charlie's Angels," Season 2, "Angels in Paradise" episode. Not that I remember. Much. Chad is paired with Cheryl Burke, who has won the DWTS title twice, one with Hall of Fame running back Emmitt Smith. Ms. R really likes the show because a.) She really likes the show and b.) it's something I'll watch with her without blabbering cuz my jaw is on the floor.

* Growing Pet Peeve: Publications that aggressively use Twitter to drive traffic to their sites only to find out it's subscription content once you get there. Hello, Baseball America and Sports Business Daily, you bozos.

* One of my favorite Twitter feeds is @historyday, where we learn on this date in 1862, the Civil War ironclads USS Monitor and CSS Virginia (nee, Merrimack) fight to a draw off the coast of Hampton Roads, Va., and actor George Burns died in 1996. Wait, George Burns is dead?

* The dumbasses at the Cincinnati Enquirer are trying something called "First in Print," where they withhold one story of each section of the newspaper from being placed online until the next day. This concept supposedly rewards the paying customers and will perhaps drive circulation. Quick: How many of you rushed out to buy your Sunday Enquirer because you couldn't read John Fay's Insider column on Brandon Phillips online?

* Meet Rascal, world's ugliest dog. Shhhhhhhhudder.

* Meet Fifi Coco Puff, world's dumbest dog name and pissy li'l varmint that has more house privileges than I do (image purposefully omitted, varmint).

* You know you're old when you don't watch the Oscars because you forgot. We didn't see one movie in the theater in 2009. That's why HD television and surround sound are killing theaters. That, and $4 for a box of Milk Duds you can buy at Walmart for $1.

* Data visualization overload of famous movie quotes. 

* What a lousy TV season. I even gave up on "BBQ Pitmasters" on TLC. "The Office" is having its worst season (a comedy that hasn't been funny) and the final season of "Lost" has been absurd. We would drop 7 and punt if not for having invested into every episode since the pilot in 2004. And, after a nice revival last year, we dropped "24" after three (yawwwwwn) hours this year. Apparently, so have a lot of other people. The show is teetering on cancellation after this season.

The only new network show with any legs has been "Modern Family." It's funny and edgy but is it "appointment TV?" I hate their use of mockumentary style interviews. But then, I also hate Life cereal. . . .

* Oh. Speaking of which . . . Chocolate Cheerios. Best chocolate cereal of all time? I dunno. Cocoa Puffs are pretty awesome and make great chocolate milk. Cocoa Pebbles are pretty rich in chocolate, too. Chocolate Rice Krispies treats? Count Chocula? Tough call. . . .

* You Can't Make This Stuff Up Dept.: We have a young regular at Red Letter Daze named Ashland A-Team who so happens to be a minister who his body adorned with Reds tattoos. He also eats his hot dogs with a fork.

* You Can't Make This Stuff Up Dept. II: After the Reds-Royals game yesterday in Goodyear, they had a senior stroll around the bases.

* March 17 is St. Patrick's Day and Reds fans know what that means. Yep, the green caps. Get ready, get yours. Looks good this year.

* Mitchell Conrad Stinson's biography of the great Reds hitter, Hall of Famer Edd Roush, is due out any time now. Roush was the star of the 1919 world championship team and a fiery, colorful guy. He died in 1988 at age 94, swearing to his grave the Reds would have beaten the Black Sox without the gambling scandal.

* The Biz of Baseball web site has a look at the top ballpark giveaways in MLB this year. The Orioles' 1970 Brooks Robinson replica jersey is killer, and so is the Brewers' Klement's Italian Sausage bobber. The Carlos Pena toothbrush holder has choppers (har). However, Lawyers Night with the Marlins is disputable as a top 10 because the stunt doesn't include a school bus to throw them under.

* And, finally, since there is usually a music element on TOL, I saw on the wires the other day that Elton John and the great Leon Russell are teaming for a new album. If you don't know the legendary Russell, you should. He's a master songwriter, pianist and guitarist who crosses rock, R&B, country, blues, bluegrass and gospel. He was hugely popular and influential with his big band rock during the 1970s. Today, he's pushing 70 and looks like John Brown's ghost.

My brother is a huge Leon Russell fan--and so was our old man. In 1973, Leon went on a world tour that became Billboard's concert of the year and can be heard on his spectacular triple-LP "Leon Live" CD.  My brother snagged tickets to one of Leon's shows and took our dad, who was 44 at the time.  They did some serious rockin' and didn't sit the entire night.  Their ears buzzed for a couple of days because their seats were next to the stage speakers. Leon tore down the house.

As the story goes, after Leon performed his final encore, he and the band exited the stage in the path of my brother and dad. As Leon approached, my old man reached over the rail, thrust a fist in the air and screamed, "LEEEEEON!!!" Russell saw him, grinned and gave him a big thumbs up.

Years later, a few days before dad died, we were in his room at hospice talking about some funny times together. My brother revisited the story of the Leon Russell concert. Dad grinned, smiled, gave a thumbs up and said with as much voice as he could muster, "LEEEEEON!!!"